Sometimes time flies by so weirdly, and I feel a bit of panic– WAIT! I think, it cannot be noon or now, nearly 4– I have too much to do still! And I know I’ve been working, and it was not all flow and fun, but still, time, phew… it’s relentless.
I just looked up, the sky got bluer since last I looked, and at the moment i looked up, a bird was flying by overhead, wings outstretched… if I had looked up one moment later, I would have missed it.
These past few days have been about near misses, near hits, wonder, excitement, reframing, regrouping.
I got excited as can be about this rather kate-sounding certification program and, after getting a bunch of questions answered, I very nearly signed up, logistics and economics be damned. It resonated with the natural way I am in the world, validated my gut instincts and intuition, made me feel it might be possible to find the motherlode of tribe and like-hearted people. And it is nearby (relatively speaking), and at one of my favorite places.
But. It is expensive. Extensive. And perhaps more about affirmation/reinforcement rather than epiphany and discovery. And the certification is for whom: me? My potential clients? What would the payback be for the investment of time and money? (Some payback is heart stuff, and that is really real. Validation is a FINE thing. Some is practical– as in, would I get more and better-fitting clients if I had this certification? would the course clarify my own purpose and direction? would I gain vast new insights to help me take a quantum leap in what I offer?)
And then, the logistics reality started to feel more thorny.
And, a supportive reframing, regrouping, and great options creation jam session/conversation with my Pa…. he asked this: if I was willing to commit to 5 hours a week and x dollars for the program, what else could I curate for myself during that time for (most likely much) less money?
What if I painted 5 hours a week? What if I spent 5 hours a week on community building? On creating the workshop/retreat I am dreaming up? Or taking online courses? Reading actual books that do not include “pookie” in the title?
I’ve already started to gather ideas and intentions, and am excited to imagine what may coalesce from this exploration.
But for the time when I had clarity + excitement + intention? DREAMY DREAMY DREAMY, and I want more of that please.